Sage Spencer: November 2009

Thursday November 5, 2009

I just watched the ABC clip of Rihanna being interviewed by Dianne Sawyer, the interviewer I would choose if I had to be interviewed in her situation.

Like many, I have been looking forward to hearing what Rihanna would have to say regarding Chris Brown’s assault on her back on February 8, 2009.

In my opinion, she did really well in the first of three pieces that are set to air over two days on ABC. The second piece airs on Good Morning America tomorrow morning and the entire interview airs on 20/20 tomorrow night. For the first time since Barbara Walters left 20/20, I will be watching it tomorrow night.

I was impressed. She has come far from a girl in an abusive relationship. Yes, she says she originally went back to Chris Brown after he assaulted her. However, it seems that she woke up to the truth soon after, that she did not want to teach people to go back to an abuser. She seems to grasp intensely that she is a role model to young girls. She gets indefatigably that if she had stayed with Chris Brown that she would be sending the message to legions of young female fans that it is ok for a man to hit you. She should be applauded for making the right decision and sending the right message. She is clear on what she wants them to learn from her experience. In her own words:

“Don’t react off of love. F-Love! Come out of the situation and look at it third person and for what it really is and then make your decision because love is so blind.”

Part two of this Blog will continue after the rest of Rihanna’s interview has aired…

Tuesday November 17, 2009

I watched the rest of Rihanna’s interview with Dianne Sawyer that aired on 20/20.

The only other point I want to add from my original blog is to echo thoughts of Rihanna’s regarding Chris Brown.

After watching Chris Brown’s online apology to fans, his Larry King Live appearance and his MTV one, I was left thinking, “this boy just doesn’t get it”.

That is my biggest concern now. I think Rihanna gets it and thank God she took the role model route. Countless young girls will benefit from her decision, not to mention that she will save herself years of pain by avoiding being with a man who is not ready to love a woman.

I do not think Chris Brown is a bad guy or that he cannot one day be a good man for a woman, but right now I do not think he gets it. And if he does really get it, he has not once communicated that so far.

I am glad to see that Rihanna also thought that Chris’ apology sounded like he was reading off a teleprompter.

Rihanna is dead on when she says: "I didn't know if he understood the extent of what he did." I do not think he yet gets it.

Rihanna described Chris in his abusive rage as

"he had no soul in his eyes, just blank".

The man she hopes will

"accept this as a man would and accept the responsibility and not find a way to feel sorry for himself"

is not there yet…not even close.

I hope for his future girlfriends’ sake, the court’s mandated counseling will get him there and one day we will see a genuine apology from a man who does get it, not because we deserve one, because we don’t, but because he could help young men, the way Rihanna has helped young women…if he were to truly get it one day.